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JANE HORWITZ - FAMILY FILMGOER |
``Doogal'' (G, 1 hr., 21 min.) Hard to follow and often garish looking, this subpar computer-animated feature for little children is a head-scratcher. Why pad it with bad jokes aimed at adults -- quote 1960s rock lyrics, for instance -- when there is so little in it to make its target audience laugh or even feel? Based on a classic British animated children's TV show, ``The Magic Roundabout,'' ``Doogal'' must have left the charm behind. In a toylike village, with toylike citizens, the little longhaired dog of the title (voiced by Daniel Tay) inadvertently causes a disaster. The candy truck he was raiding crashes into the town carousel, which breaks, releasing an evil wizard, Zeebad (voice of Jon Stewart). Zeebad and his nemesis, Zebedee (Ian McKellen), a good wizard, are clownlike fellows with springs instead of legs. Zeebad uses his icy powers to freeze the carousel with all the kids on it, including Doogal's beloved Florence (Kylie Minogue). Doogal and his pals Train (Chevy Chase) the choo-choo, Dylan the rabbit (Jimmy Fallon), Brian the snail (William H. Macy) and Ermintrude the cow (Whoopi Goldberg) set out to retrieve three magical diamonds that can save the kids and stop Zeebad's evil. The littlest moviegoers may cringe when the heroes teeter on a bridge above molten lava, fight a skeleton with glowing eyes, or careen through a tunnel. Three characters appear to die at various points, but all are fine by the end. There is mild toilet humor. --0-- --0-- --0-- ``Aquamarine'' (PG, 1 hr., 49 min.) Thirteen-year-old best friends discover a mermaid in their Florida beach club pool after a violent storm in this sweet, unassuming ``tween'' fantasy, based on the book by Alice Hoffman. ``Aquamarine'' ought to delight girls 10 and older, as it is a fairly rich exploration of the subtleties of girl friendships and these early team efforts to get the attention of boys. The movie also deals gently with the trauma of losing parents to death or divorce and the pain of having to move away. Apart from a snarky villainess (Arielle Kebbel) straight out of every teen film ever made, ``Aquamarine'' proves a fresh, if somewhat underproduced frolic. It contains a mild joke about developing breasts, skimpy bikinis, a slightly scary storm, and a rare, semi-crude insult that rhymes-with-witch. Claire (Emma Roberts of Nickelodeon's ``Unfabulous'') lives with her grandparents, since her parents' accidental drowning. She has a morbid fear of swimming and a need to control everything. Her best friend Hailey (pop singer Joanna ``JoJo'' Levesque) will soon move to Australia with her divorced mom. Hailey is very angry about this and Claire is desperate not to lose her. The mermaid, Aquamarine (Sara Paxton of the NBC show ``Darcy's Wild Life''), has beached herself and sprouted legs (at least while the sun is up) to find a man who loves her, so she can prove to her storm-churning merman dad that love is not a myth and arranged marriages are bad. The girls agree to help the goofy beauty by fixing her up with the hunky lifeguard, Raymond (Jake McDorman), whom they also worship. This requires much magazine research for flirting tips. --0-- --0-- --0-- ``16 Blocks'' (PG-13, 1 hr., 42 min.) Terrific performances from Bruce Willis and Mos Def, a crackerjack script and a clever-as-clockwork plot that keeps raising the stakes as it unfolds in real time make ``16 Blocks'' one of the best action thrillers to come out of Hollywood in a good while. High-schoolers ought to get a major charge out of it and even buy into its slightly corny, but nevertheless touching, redemption theme. This is one of the new PG-13s: It has many R-ish qualities, stopping just short of earning the actual rating -- blood, not guts, profanity, not obscenity. So it is iffy fare for middle-schoolers, with its point-blank shootouts, intense confrontations, dead bodies, harrowing bus crash and implied endangerment of innocent bystanders. The film includes drug references and heavy drinking. Willis plays Jack, a sweaty, burned-out, alcoholic New York police detective with a bum leg and lots of guilt. While driving a young convict named Eddie (Def) to testify before a grand jury, Jack foils an attempted hit. He learns that a cadre of bad cops, led by his old partner (David Morse), wants the kid dead before he gets to the courthouse. Eddie, a wise soul who just needs a second chance, seems to sense old Jack could still be a stand-up guy. Their heroes' journey is a doozy. --0-- --0-- --0-- ``Tyler Perry's Madea's Family Reunion'' (PG-13, 1 hr., 47 min.) While not as hilarious or narratively clear as ``Diary of a Mad Black Woman'' (PG-13, 2005), this adaptation by Tyler Perry of another of his popular ``urban'' stage plays offers a watchable mix of soap opera, romance, farce and spiritual uplift. Though aimed more at grown women, the film will appeal to some high-school girls, though its themes may be too adult for middle-schoolers. Perry's plays, while quite universal, are grounded in African-American life and hinge upon that riotous battle-ax, Madea (Perry himself in busty, droopy drag; he also directed and plays two supporting roles), and the extended family to whom she dispenses wisdom, tough love and, to the kids, many politically incorrect, if comical, beatings. Madea helps one niece (Rochelle Aytes) escape an abusive fiance (Blair Underwood) and another (Lisa Arrindell Anderson), a wary single mom, gain the confidence to love again. In addition to spousal abuse (we see two hard smacks and other roughness), there are verbal recollections of childhood sexual abuse. For comedy's sake, old men ogle a young woman's behind and joke about Viagra. Other innuendo, implied nudity, mild profanity, flatulence gags and drug references also warrant the PG-13. --0-- --0-- --0-- BEYOND THE RATINGS GAME-- KINDERGARTENERS AND OLDER: ``Doogal'' G (NEW) (Sub-mediocre computer-animated tale for tots, based on old British TV series has incoherent plot, too many bad puns and jokes geared to adults, too little genuine feeling and a garish look; title dog (voice of Daniel Tay) and his pals the rabbit Dylan (Jimmy Fallon), snail Brian (William H. Macy), cow Ermintrude (Whoopi Goldberg) and Train (Chevy Chase) go on a journey to find three magical diamonds in order to stop the escaped evil wizard Zeebad (Jon Stewart) from freezing the world, and to save Florence (Kylie Minogue), Doogal's little girl owner and the other kids frozen in the carousel. Tots may cringe when heroes teeter on bridge over molten lava, fight skeleton with glowing eyes, careen through mine shaft; three characters seem to be dead at various points, but all are fine by the end; mild toilet humor.) ``Curious George'' G (Plain vanilla but still sweet hand-drawn 'toon expands on adventures of mischievous monkey from beloved 60-plus-year-old books by Margret and H.A. Rey; (he's technically a chimp -- no tail); George befriends Ted, aka The Man with the Yellow Hat (voice of Will Ferrell), a timid museum curator, while Ted is in Africa; he stows away on Ted's return ship and follows him home; George's all-over finger painting, nosiness get them both in trouble. Rare scary stuff: in the jungle George's graffiti gets angry looks from hippo, elephant, lion; city traffic nearly gets him; he nearly floats away with balloons till Ted saves him; brief sadness when a desperate Ted has George shipped back to Africa -- a happy reunion follows; Junior (David Cross), sour son of Ted's boss (Dick Van Dyke), is overly nasty; brazen, exploitative product placement of Dole logo, others.) -- 10 AND OLDER: ``Aquamarine'' PG (NEW) (Refreshing ``tween'' tale (based on Alice Hoffman's novel) about best friends (Emma Roberts of Nickelodeon's ``Unfabulous'' and pop singer Joanna ``JoJo'' Levesque) who discover a goofy mermaid (Sara Paxton of Saturday TV's ``Darcy's Wild Life'') in their beach club pool after a storm; they keep her secret, help her find true love (during the day, when she has legs) with a lifeguard (Jake McDorman) they worship; she helps them get their wishes; underproduced but enjoyable exploration of friendship, coming-of-age; flawed by a cliched teen villainess (Arielle Kebbel). Discussion of parental death, divorce; trauma of moving away; mild joke about developing breasts; skimpy bikinis; scary storm; rare, semi-crude insult (as in rhymes-with-witch).) ``Eight Below'' PG (Highly absorbing adventure -- loosely based on a real incident -- about eight sled dogs at a research station in Antarctica, left on their own during a brutal winter after human crew's emergency evacuation; the dogs' thrilling, sometimes tragic struggle for survival parallels the comparatively pallid tale of their master's (Paul Walker) guilty efforts to get back to them. PLOT GIVEAWAYS: older dog fades away, not up to the ordeal; another falls off cliff, soon dies of his injuries; in truly scary sequence, dogs find whale carcass to feed on, but a huge seal (animatronic puppet in close-ups) bursts out and charges them, giving one a bad leg wound; a child well under 10 at a preview got so upset she had to leave; other much milder, non-gory scenes show dogs stalking, catching and eating birds; human characters have sledding accidents; a man falls through the ice, nearly drowns; rare mild curse words; muted sexual innuendo; beer.) ``The Pink Panther'' PG (Slapstick silliness, bad French accents abound in amiably droll remake of Blake Edwards' classic 1960s comedies about bumbling Inspector Clouseau; Steve Martin mugs appealingly as the simpering idiot, though doesn't (BEG ITAL)become(END ITAL) him as fully as original star Peter Sellers did; inspired bits with Kevin Kline as his smug superior, though plot is a dud, visuals drab. Semi-lewd comic sexual innuendo; trysting with a pop diva (Beyonce Knowles), he loses his blue pill (implied Viagra); he puts electrodes in his pants, after which his fly smoulders; he looks at antique brass bowls but pronounces ``bowls'' with the ``a'' sound in ``falls''; a brandished gun; two bloodless murders; fisticuffs; extensive flatulence gag.) -- PG-13s: ``16 Blocks'' (NEW) (Crackerjack crime thriller unfolds in real time, with terrific turns by Bruce Willis as Jack, a burned-out, alcoholic New York cop, Mos Def as Eddie, a charming, soulful convict; while taking Eddie to testify before a grand jury, Jack foils an attempted hit against him; corrupt cops, led by Jack's ex-partner (David Morse) wants the kid dead -- he knows too much; Eddie inspires Jack to believe redemption is possible, if they can just get to the courthouse. Many R-ish elements stop just short -- blood, not guts, profanity, not obscenity; point-blank shootings; dead bodies; scary bus crash; innocent bystanders endangered; drug references; drinking. Iffy for middle-schoolers.) ``Tyler Perry's Madea's Family Reunion'' (NEW) (Film adaptation of another of Perry's popular urban stage comedies mixes farce, soap opera, spiritual uplift entertainingly, but with less narrative coherence, raucous wit than in his ``Diary of a Mad Black Woman'' (PG-13, 2005); comical battle-ax, Madea (Perry in pendulous drag -- he also directed, plays two smaller roles), helps one niece (Rochelle Aytes) escape her abusive fiance (Blair Underwood) and another (Lisa Arrindell Anderson), raising two kids alone, learn to trust again. Spousal abuse -- two hard smacks, other roughness; verbal recollections of childhood sexual abuse; old men ogle young woman's behind, joke about Viagra; milder sexual innuendo; implied nudity; mild profanity; drug references; flatulence gags. Themes too adult for many middle-schoolers.) ``Date Movie'' (Alyson Hannigan as hapless overweight heroine who works in dad's (Eddie Griffin) coffee shop and meets Mr. Right (Adam Campbell) in heavy-handed, cheaply made, but sometimes broadly amusing spoof of romantic comedies -- ``My Best Friend's Wedding'' (PG-13, 1997), ``My Big Fat Greek Wedding'' (PG, 2002), ``Hitch'' (PG-13, 2005), ``Meet the Fockers'' (PG-13, 2004) and others. Antics too lewd, cruel, crude for middle-schoolers: construction worker shoots himself in head with nail gun; guy on TV dating show shoots girls he doesn't like; heroine gets gross ``makeover'' at auto body shop -- her back waxed, fat extruded from her tush; verbal sexual innuendo includes takeoff on ``I'll have what she's having'' orgasm joke from ``When Harry Met Sally'' (R, 1989); racial, ethnic humor; profanity; flatulent (animatronic) cat licks skeletal remains. Yech.) -- R's: ``Running Scared'' (At times visually, viscerally smashing, but mostly pretentious, over-stylized thriller hinging on exploitative portrayal of 10-year-old boys in mortal danger among gangsters, perverted child pornographers/killers; Paul Walker as New Jersey mobster must retrieve incriminating gun swiped by his young son's (Alex Neuberger) best friend (Cameron Bright), who uses it to stop an abusive stepdad (Karel Roden). Very bloody shootouts, beatings; guns put to boy's head; nonexplicit, but creepy -- and arguably gratuitous -- sequence shows boy abducted by child pornographers/killers posing as nice couple; much bellowed profanity; nude dancers; drug use. No one under 17.) ``Freedomland'' (Samuel L. Jackson in emotionally muscular turn as New Jersey police detective in often powerful but uneven tale, marred by odd shifts in tone; Julianne Moore also sears screen as unstable white woman who claims she was carjacked by a black man near a housing project and that her little boy was in the car; racial tensions roil. Strong profanity; restrained but strongly intended racial slurs; marijuana; references to harder drugs; references to a sexual affair; understated violence in face-offs between project residents, riot police -- one full-scale disturbance with nightstick beatings; man falls from a window, but no deaths, graphic injuries shown; Jackson's character has asthma attacks. 16 and older.)
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